Friday, December 16, 2016


I've always loved trees. They remind me of the song, 'the trees of the field will clap their hands '. As a child I've talked to the ones on MCC campus fence.
I tell Amy to look at the bark, touch and feel and see how big,majestic they look and how wide spread and comfy the branches are to birds and animals.

My love of my job, got transfixed because of our campus. The green campus. Plants, flowers, landscape changing quite frequently and I've enjoyed them all. I've gulped in the beauty and they were my pride. The road to our campus, GST road also fascinates me. Trees,extending their limbs.

The aftereffects of the cyclone on Monday chopped a part of me.. The GST road looks barren. Heaps of fallen trees. Twisted and broken. Walking through our campus,is like walking in a war zone. Huge trees lay fallen. Leaves strewn all over. Lifeless beauties on the ground, never to return back to glory.  The MCC campus too. Trees of all sizes and shapes. Such beauty. Lost in few hours.

I am sure, they'll try to make it grow to same glory, but it hurts. To see them all uprooted and dead. 4 hours of terrible wind. 1 day effect. Is all it took, to devastate years of growth. Lesson for life.
Character.attitude.decision. wealth. Power. Glory. Absolutely nothing is permanent. Except for the creator. The unchanging,all-powerful, all knowing God. Humbles me.

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Immeasurably more !

With Andrea crawling, I can't help but look back 2 years earlier when Amy was this small. Turmoil. That's of less description. Burnt chicken. Definitely. Head under water. Yes for sure. I had prayed that I was leaping into the unknown,knowing He'll hold me. The one who held me as the Apple of his eye this far, will see me through, was my faith. He was my anchor. He would never leave me.

He did see me through. I was clinging on to Him his promises though, it dint look any positive. It was terrible. I was going in circles. I got a wall sticker, that said " He calms the storm to a whisper and stills the wave. Psalms 107:29" I believed it. He is my Lord. He stilled my heart. I renewed my faith. "Who am I in Christ" poster revived me. I was bubbling again. I did have difficulty, but I was sure He will see me through. Single mom or whatever.

Yesterday, a distant friend who had known my situation then asked me, if I got a new husband. ROFL. I said no, but in fact, I think I did. He has changed. So have I. Lot of things have changed in me. We still have the struggles. But He sees us through. 'Who would have thought, ' Gen 21:7 that I would have another baby? For all that I went through that 1 yr 10 months.  Moreover, for someone who had harmone imbalance all my life, this is again nothing short of a miracle.

And for those who think relationship is like a mirror, once broken it can never mend? Well, I can tell you, that mine was broken to pieces and God the healer, mended it. As good as new. I am not sure , if I have the scar even. He's faithful. He's trustworthy. His love endures forever. I am his Apple of his eye. So this verse has been true in my life.  Ephesians 3:20
him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us
3 years later, I have in my hand another pretty blessing. It is definitely, immeasurably more that I asked or imagined. His power is at work within us. Yippppeee!

Tuesday, October 25, 2016


Aaah.... I can't believe I dint jot down any learnings or happenings  this year. It's been super busy with my lil girls.

Amy2 is Claribel Andrea. Amy and Andrea look a lot similar, I guess. Amy has been extra clingy to me. But she has been talking  a lot. She's in LKG now. Loves telling stories. All imaginary ones.

She loves Shaun the sheep. Masha and the bear. Mickey mouse club house, Dora and friends, paw patrol.

So I get to hear stories where the main characters are  Shaun, goofy, Reuben, Simeon (both from the story of Joseph-thanks to beginner Bible videos.) And Jesus, and angels. She can go on and on and on. If you don't listen to her stories, you'll be bitten. And be assured that whatever you have in hand will be thrown away.

Her expressions are fantastic. Her eyes would speak a thousand words itself. Her hand gestures are so animated, it's beautiful to watch. She cant stand still. She would walk, or jump or climb. Her favorite place is the bed. Like a stage she uses it to walk on pillows, toys or whate er. She'll give you a choice. Big story or small story. Either will be too long.  Her stories are not correlated. You will hear Shaun and reuban most of the time . A monkey or a big Pete that's beaten or chased away. If you ask when the story will end, she'll say in a minute. She'll then end the story quickly for you and close it with THEE END.
She'll then ask, was it big story or small. I try to match up with hpice earlier as she would have taken time to meet it.

This post was supposed to be for Andrea isn't it? Aaah. Well what does she ? She watches her sister iñtently. Wonder how she's gonna be when she's three. Chatterbox for sure!

Thursday, June 4, 2015

Slowing down

My neighbors say that they are scared when I run down the stairs every morning.
I have to walk a good 10 mins to the bus stop. 4-5 mins run otherwise. From the earlier near misses, I was much better, but it was anyway a morning run. AND evening run too.

They said in your career there will be dial down, dial up phase.  In this project, where we are in a phase that feels like golive is a week away (SIT starts on June 15.)  my doctor has told me to slow down.
No running down the stairs.  No running to busbay. No walking fast.  Slow down.

Be still.

Monday, May 11, 2015


JDA Uncle was my God father. Before I ever knew what that meant, I knew he was someone special in our household. He and my dad had been good friends for years. Uncle was a world traveller, a great story teller, that he could go on and on. He was a visionary.

Recovered from TB, and finishing  Bangarpet Bible school, he had taken over VBS from Hamilton. Teaching children the way of the Lord was his passion. He had dreams of a Bible world. A great Bible teacher, who insisted on teaching the Bible and living it, rather than just preaching it.

He made the Bible alive in all its glory. The Bible history - scrolls, earlier printing history, and even the flowers, animals, grains in the Bible brought in so much meaning as you hear him speak. He enjoyed what he taught, and his energy and enthusiasm is catchy. You will be pulled into the world of Bible with power.

He had got my dad, the tape recorder for helping with VBS pictures.  My brothers made good use of it, for their first light and sound programs. They recorded their cooked up stories, make shift music, my brothers songs, my voice and so much more back in the 80s.

Uncle lived such a simple life, the love of his life, his wife Beulah had passed away years ago. I took pride in being called his beul. I wish I had met him after my little girl was born. He wanted to see her. I remember his words. I wish I had called him often. :(

The first thought when I heard that he is no more, is that the warmth he would have felt when he stepped into heaven. The width and length and breadth of heaven in all its beauty and glory would have been such a amazing moment. He would have met his wife, met my mom, and whole lot of people. He would be busy basking in the love and joy and excited.

But the reality that I will never get to see him, or see his email, or hear his voice is heart breaking. I dono why i am in such an emotional mess. But I guess loved him a lot, and wish I had seen him and given him a hug.

Sunday, April 19, 2015

I told you so

I was holding Amy in my arms and she was clutching a small toy in her little hands.

She had just woken up and wanted to be held.  I took the toy from her hand, and it slipped from my fingers.  The moment it dropped,  I gave a 'achacho' and she looking straight at my eyes,  and with her little finger pointed up, said 'sonaen la' in the most authoritative tone!

I was dumbstruck at the way it was delivered and couldn't help laughing as she repeated it over and over!

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

What's good about Good Friday!

I've had friends wishing me happy good Friday, and I had to say,  you can wish me happy Easter instead.  Then comes the question,  why is good Friday called good,  when it about the pain and suffering of Jesus and his brutal death?

Jesus died. I am alive. Killed. I am free. My curse is gone.  My anxiety, fear, punishment,  death is gone.  I am made his child.  I am grafted into his family. I now call him dad.

Why did he do it?  He loves me and the entire world.  His final plan to redeem the whole world.  But was he a victim to the Roman soldiers ? The Bible says he laid down his life.  He took the punishment that was due to us. 

He was pierced for our transgressions and the punishment that brought us peace was upon him.

Now every thing has a solution.  Every complex situation.  Every impossible problems.  Because Jesus died and he knows, understands the pain,  the fear, anxiety, death and he conquered it. 

And what's more?  He's alive!  His spirit dwells in us.  The God who made the sun,  the stars,  and makes the earth revolve in its axis in precision,  is in me!  Guiding me,  loving me,  caring me,  teaching me, hugging me every single day.

Oh how much good did that Friday bring to us!

Railway track.

Have you seen the railway track?  Runs in parallel, but never touching?

Ahh, that's what I feel most of the days this past months.  We are in endless calls.  Calls with client, calls with team,  calls with manager.  I can blame the language. But still,  I end up clueless on certain calls.

You explain something,  and someone says another. We talk the same thing,  but just don't seem to get it across! We start all over again,  and end up talking for 30 minutes on the same subject.  And then you wonder why such a simple concept as simple as abc take such a long time to get it.

Each one is built differently.  The way they talk,  understand,  put it forward. The personality, temperament, attitude, behavior. 

Many a times as I talk in this endless conversation,  I  remember the railway track. Ever close,  but never connecting! It is frustrating and you can't help laughing how much you wasted your time,  energy on something so simple!

I wonder what God thinks. His ways and mine!

Food Court

I was passing through food court today morning.  All was calm and quiet. There were considerable amount of people around. But was quite peaceful.

It got me thinking. No one can identify a manager, fresher,  a DM in the food court. We are all the same.  Everyone knew why they were there.  Nobody had to be told to eat,  or pick food,  leave their plates.

I wish work was that way.  No one to monitor, no one to tell. Every one just do their job,  because they knew it was their job!

Oh how I wish!

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Enga Amma enga

That's the first thing she asks when she gets up.  And the stress is on the first word.  

I am never there when she gets up. But weekends I get to see at times when I am not in the bed with her.  She goes 'enga Amma enga?'  for about 10,15 times in short succession.  That even before I rush to the bed,  she would be in tears chanting these words.

I wish and hope I search, for Christ like that every morning!