Monday, October 15, 2012

Chapter 3

Me a mother, ha! In your dreams.   Mothers are special. The magic of unconditional love flows automatically from them. I wasn’t sure, I was made of that material.  I asked the nurse thrice, if she was sure, the test was positive. She was surprised at my tone J So it was exciting.  A new life inside me?

The changes soon started happening.  I have never given much thought to my physical body, so it was pretty strange when one by one, I started feeling and noticing the differences.  It made me more feminine I think. It is an experience, which I have never felt before. As months passed, and when people noticed, it becomes increasingly clear, that yes am a mother… and am feeding the baby through me.

I have always felt anger, when people said, motherhood, is what a woman is made for- a woman’s ultimate fulfillment.  What about nuns. What about those who could not beget children?  Well, I don’t think they have anything against them. But what is amazing about motherhood, is that it switches on like a switch, and those hormones, glands, nerves, and organs seem to turn on and act differently. The transformation is automatic and unbelievable!  You get aches and pains, which you never had before, and your belly just grows..Right from skin, everything transforms.  It is weird and strange.  Magic? Miracle?  It is even, more awkward to realize that you have living being inside of you.  Carrying a baby by hand is different, but having it deep inside your skin? Well, I am sorry for creating such a hype over this. But it does feel like alien walking around with a life inside of you- moving, breathing, kicking and living inside.

Our God is so awesome! I stand speechless before our creator!

Chapter 2

Just like all the novels I have read, I thought wedding, would mean addition of a character in your life. Perhaps 1 more family into yours.  Having had a wide range of friends in Chapter 1, Chapter 2 did not seem intimidating.   I was wrong. It was a complete 180 degree turn.  Life seemed so simple earlier. I wondered what I got myself into. It was interesting though. And mighty challenging.  It was like being roasted on the furnace, to be purified in word, thought and deed.

Did you really mean unconditional love at the altar? Can you really love as Jesus did? No grudge, no hurt or hate, but lovingly can you handle everything? I thank God, for my soft natured guy.  We are poles apart. He is North pole and I am south.  I can probably count the similarities between us.  This has made it even more interesting. I had 2 requests to God. One, that he would be so much in love with God, than me.  That was granted. Two. For someone who has never fallen in love, marriage was daunting. So I had prayed, that I would fall in love- head over heels with the guy I marry.  That was granted too. I keep telling him, that he discovered me. My feminity, my inner self, my wants and needs more than I ever knew!  It was scary, but pretty crazy.

Marriage is hardwork. I learnt that.  You have to work hard at it. It is so much easy to do things your way, to think just about you, but a lot of work to think about the other person.  But there is joy and fulfillment along the way. Whenever I think, I have learnt the gist of marriage life, I seem to learn it all over again, from square 1.  I guess life is a ‘Snake and Ladder’ game afterall!