Give up!

Give up? how rude! It is a huge graffiti on a building that I cross everyday to work. 'Give up' on the way to work is sure not helping!

But it made me think, what kind of signs do I put on, to people around me? At work, or home, do they see me as annoying/offending/proud person or an encouraging/humble/helping/ motivating person.

What do people read you as?

Bits of paper.

It was a huge building. A place that can easily hold 500 people. We had our christmas program there, and the crowd had just left after a sumptuous dinner. Nobody told us to clean up, but few of us started to pick up the trash.


In that huge room, left over cups, spilled food, drinks, scattered plates, paper napkins were all over the place. A huge mess all around. We started to clean. Some started sweeping, some on all fours, wiping a spill. some stooping with the dust pan. And it made me think. There was no specific method. No competition. No one to tell how to, or why to. No one to check if we did it well, applaud, or supervise. No one to compare who did better. But we were all picking up trash. We were moving fast, and we were trying to quickly get it cleaned up and we did finish up within approx 30 mins.

It made me wonder, if it was the answer I was looking for. In this world- like our huge room, we have trash all over. God has placed us in different places, in different situations. Could be a tough spot at work, a small help at church, a small chore for a friend, a phone call to a friend, a small prayer for an ailing friend, could be Houston, or Chennai. Different places, different need, different environment, problems, different situations. There is no competition, no comparison. No specific method. The only target is to help clean the mess. A servant attitude. To help as much as we can, as quick as we can in the harvest.

I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for harvest. John 4:35b
37 Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. 38 Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.” Matthew 9:37,38

Got Inheritance?

When a lil baby is born, everyone is anxious, and quick to respond who the child resembles. His nose is from the dad's side of the family. His dimple cheeks is from his great aunt. His thick hair is from her granddad.

On that Sunday, we learnt about Michael's grandpa. A hardworker, who shined his shoes and tucked his shirt every morning . He inherits that discipline and hardwork from him. But above all, he remembers his dad dressed up and sitting at his desk every morning for the quiet time.

I have never seen my mom, dad have a fight, not even raised their voices against eachother or at us. I have seen them handle disagreements in a calm, serene way. At any instance of pain or fear or joy or confusion ( wherever we are), I have seen them say 'Lets pray' and pray aloud immediately, as if God is right there standing next to you. I have seen my dad on his knees for hours every morning. With tears in his eyes praying, with his bible wide open. I have sneaked in on my brother to watch him on his knees, and even read few of his 'post it' notes- letters, he has written to God. I have seen my mom, instilling the power of family prayer every night. I have seen my brother on his knees, fasting and standing in the gap.

Looking back, I see that I have learnt more from observing my family and not from anyone 'telling me to'. That's the biggest inheritance I have got.

I dedicate this blog to all my friends who are mothers/fathers.
My pastor said, if you want a Queen for a wife, check if you are as responsible as a King. I think I can extend it to, if you want good, obedient, polite, smart and happy children, be sure what you leave as an inheritance. Little eyes are watching you.

Deuteronomy 6:7
7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
Proverbs 22:6
6 Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.

Nourishing and Tempting

Ok, I accept. Most of the time I forget to pray before I eat my food. It especially happens when I am very hungry. I have caught myself chewing/gulping when I remember and start praying.

So it was a thunderbolt when a friend equaled that to what Eve did in Eden, with the fruit. "Good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes". Oh yes, nourishing and tempting that it can even cloud being thankful for our food.

Mom always reminded us of the thousands who have no food/no proper food. Lord, help me to be thankful everyday, for the food in my plate!

925 million undernourished people in the world today. Check where people are hungry in this map. Courtesy: Wfp.org
http://documents.wfp.org/stellent/groups/public/documents/communications/wfp229328.pdf

Christmas lights?

Oh they are beautiful! Lights everywhere. On trees, on the bushes,even on the tall buildings, on the fence, on the rooftops, the houses, the streets on either side of the roads! The whole city is lit up. I have never seen anything like that before.Red, green and gold!

I sure was carried away, by the beauty of all of it.

Amidst all the beauty, and the excitement, as someone who has seen the otherside of the world, I can't help but gasp at the huge diversity!

But seeing the below display, made me beam wide!

Shopping or Cemetry?

Call me weird, but I like going to the cemetry. Just walking around, reading the epitaphs, calculating their age, and matching the family members! Old tombstones -100-200 years old are even more interesting. Would they have known, that someone from this century would read about them??

It is one place with NO activity. A place so silent, and so still. It seems the world stops spinning there. People who were alive and kicking, with friends, family, someone who laughed, was hugged, kissed, and loved, are now jst a name above the ground. Here lies someone who was once dedicated hardworker, a loving mother, an intelligent scientist, a millionare, a talented singer, a kind doctor they all end up six feet under. Whatever they worked for, lived for, their aspirations, their achievements, everything comes to a standstill. 99% of those who are buried there, don't come there willingly. Ironic aint it.

Working for a leading death care industry, I finaly got the opportunity to see one of their cemetry. The very STRANGE thing, which I've never seen in India was, those well and alive ( not dead), leave their name on the tombstone, with their birthyear. ( Seems it is cheaper to add only the death year later- like that of the picture). Weird? I think that actualy makes you well prepared for that big day. Afterall, that's bound to happen anytime!

Oh yeah, going to a cemetry is less intidimating than shopping. Atleast for weirdo me!

None

Who wants to do nothing? Get up late, laze around, do absolutely nothing all day, but still get paycheck? What do you think?? My pastor asked us to raise our hands. Few hands went up. He asked us again, and this time to tell the truth. :) He raised his hands first. We all did. It felt good to know that its just not me!

Bare minimum. That's what we do at times. Barely getting by. Do nothing, but want to get reward. Easy life. No trouble, no hiccups. Just glide through.

But God wants us to give our best. The best of our strength, our finances, relationships,our health,our time, life. Lesson from the parable of talents. The king does ask for returns. We ought to give the max effort, with whatever we have. Fight against our own desire to be lazy or to do just the bare minimum, but maximise all that we have to the full potential, making use of every opportunity.

He went on, 'God put us in the field to play'. We are just happy to be in the team, and if we don't watch the ball, but just linger around the outfield, you will be chucked out of the field.

Matthew 25:14-30

Restless

I dono why, but recently when I read the passage of Judas, where he decides to betray Christ, it occured to me how he would have felt. Satan had entered into him. and you can imagine, how that would have been. CHAOTIC. The struggle, restlessness, all the worst possible ideas, confusion, doubt, fear, anger, despair. He gave in and then finaly gave up his very life.

I am bad in taking decisions ( big or small), thinking on the pros and cons, what might, what may not, working out the permutation and combination, it is a mess(h) of thoughts. But when the thoughts are too overwhelming, and over controlling that it overflows, we are restless, with too much going on in our minds. Yes or a no, to be or not to be. Yickes. It sure drives me crazy.

But I have learnt to understand that Satan loves keeping me confused( he sure is jumping with joy), pouring out doubts and flow of random, irregular thoughts that can tangle me and get me tied up. It can cloud our minds so bad, that it boxes us up, all we are is restless and a wall builds up blocking the face of God. For after all that's his goal to keep us away from God.

So the key is to turn our eyes upon Jesus, to look full in his wonderful face. And the things of the earth will grow strangely dim, In the light of His glory and grace!! Oh the tight situation remains. Being cornered and demanded of a decision.Yes or No. To be or not to be. But inspite of everything, I sure know, that God gives me the peace that surpasses all understanding, the wisdom to discern and the strength to say, not my will, but your will be done and After all, it is he who is holding me, and I can see his smile on his eyes. http://nebeula.blogspot.com/2009/01/uncertainty.html

and when we praise God, and put on our smile from the heart, inspite of the mess we are in, haha I can see the frown on the face of our foe.

What's your point in life?

What's your point in life? What are you doing? Life is brief. Too brief that we may be here today and gone tomorrow. So, what's your point in life? A question directed to those gathered at church on Sunday evening.

Is our life pointing at our job, our bank account? None of it is worth it, when you lay still at your funeral.

It is worth it, only if my life is pointing to Christ. Just like John the Baptist. He must increase and I must decrease in all that I do.

Huh, where am I pointing!

Ironic

Looking at the fish pond we cleaned last week, a friend asked if I had ever cleaned a fish pond at home. We have a 'fish tank' home, and yes I was the one who cleaned it, but it hit me real hard, if I had ever cleaned it that eagerly.

I remember my mom whenever I am in the yard. She loved plants. Flowers. Did I share her interests? I never watered the plants. I hardly took time to even look at them. She was the one planting them, watering them, re-planting them, admiring them, talking to them. My mom fed the street dogs. She saved all the leftovers for them.

She was the one who locked the gate at night, opened it in the morning. Got us coffee to our beds. Breakfast, lunch, dinner to the table. Kept the house tidy. Washed the clothes, got it ironed and neatly stored in the cupboard. She was the 'finder' of our house. Keys, purse, Id cards, shirts, bags, books, pens, letters. She could find all the lost items. She called twice daily to ensure I reached safely and left office on time. Waited eagerly till I get home. Checked if I ate properly. Forced to take any medicines.

Alrite, all the above just makes me more guilty and miss mom. Why I started writing this? Well, she had been tirelessly cooking, cleaning, working hard all her life for us. I wonder if I ever did help her out without 'hurry', without 'irritation', without 'exasperation', or 'anger'. Did I ever appreciate her for being for us. May be am doing restitution now. Cleaning the fish pond. In another country!! yuck. Cherish your mom or dad. I don't think there's anyone on earth who can love you as they do.

Ex 20:12 Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.

A What?

On my first day, of my first job, I was leaving the building to go home (at 6 PM), when I bumped into my new Manager in the elevator. She asked,"What new thing did you learn today?". I sure had lot of things to say, as it was my first day. She smiled and told me to ask myself this question every evening before leaving work. Growth requires, you learn something new everyday.

Whenever we meet, my Pastor has this question. 'What has God been doing in your life today/this week?'

This week, he asked a bigger one. When we die, and we meet God f2f, he's definitely going to ask, 'What have you done in your life to glorify me'? What is your answer? He also cautioned, that if we had done something for our feel good factor, we have just glorified ourself and not Him.

Luke 19:13So he called ten of his servants and gave them ten minas.'Put this money to work,' he said, 'until I come back.'
15b ..Then he sent for the servants to whom he had given the money, in order to find out WHAT they had gained with it.

Why sleep?

When we are always racing against time, lining up tasks to do, chores at home, deadlines to meet, complaining we have no time to finish work or spend with family and friends, inspite of so much to do, why do we sleep? When lay our body still, hands and legs doing nothing, mind (as well) absolutely doing nothing, for atleast a minimum of 5-6 hrs?

Sounds silly? It sure does, but why do we sleep? We have no control over eyes shutting close and our body pushing itself to lay down. Neither do we have control over the hunger, when the stomach clocks strikes, there is no way of shutting it up. Try not drinking the whole day, or holding your bladder or keep from batting your eyelid. We just can't.

There are rules, we just can't neglect. Rules of the body. There are rules of life too. We reap, what we sow. No matter how much we try or prove or imagine, 'all's well', what goes around comes around. Big or small. Its horrifying to know that sin demands punishment. The wrath of God is true. There is no escape.

John 3:36 Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him.

Chocolate wisdom!

I was watering the plants today, and noticed as the water hit the soil the color changed. The dirt, black and well, dirty dirt, mixed with the water was creamy and I don't know why, but it reminded me of CHOCOLATE. Yes, the creamy, yummy chocolate.

And I wondered, how chocolate became so famous, and favorite. Inspite of its dirty color. The yucky color is more a yummy color now!

And this dawned, what God was trying to teach me: It doesn't matter how you look. It only matters how you taste! To people around you. :)

Col 4:6 'Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt...'

Outlive your life

What can you do with your life? Max Lucado, puts forth a challenge, that prompts you to look into the book of Acts, at the ordinary lives of disciples, who were empowered by God, to do the extrordinary. We are no exceptions.

It starts, with exploring, to discover who we are, as God 'unshells' you. The way God has designed you to feel compassion, and longing for people. Is it the homeless, sick or the elderly? Find it out.

Then team up with people, look for avenues where God can use you. As simple as opening homes for dinner and being hospitable. Seeing people, the way Jesus saw. Into their eyes, and giving the touch that people need(Peter healing crippled beggar.)

Preparing for persecution ahead, saturating in His presence to be strong( Peter before priests). Being careful not to be a hypocrite and doing good with no one seeing you( Ananias & Sapphira).

The book focuses on Jesus target audience. The poor, the blind, broken hearted, captives and the opressed. Do we have them in this century? Don't we all around us?

It also reminds you not to forget the bread of heaven. Jesus. And not to forget who is holding you life. But to move ahead, and identify the walls we have boxed ourselves in. ( Philip ministering to Ethiopian Eunuch).

Not to write-off people like Saul! (Ananias and Paul.) How to treat discarded people.( Peter & Gentiles). Treat them right! Prayer, the praying first and most (Peter in the jail.)

Max closes with Jesus on the Judgement day separating the sheep and the goats. The question asked was not salvation.But consequence of salvation - Compassion. Did/Do we feed the hungry and the thirsty? clothe the needy? care for the sick? invite a stranger? visit a prisoner?

It is a challenge to listen to the inner voice and be obedient to take one little step at a time. It throws open a whole wide view of opportunity that is all around us. Are we ready to obey?

I am thankful for booksneeze to send me this free copy of Outlive your life. I am really overjoyed, and humbled to be 'considered' a blogger! I have greatly been blessed by this book.

Plastic smile

I guess this is my third blog on smile. And I wonder if I will ever stop. A person with a beautiful smiling face inspired me to write this. The problem is, it always has 'fake' written all over it.Always! How does he do that? yickes. I hate it.

Thinking of which, do I fake a smile? Obviously yes. Sometimes. Many a times. When I am sad, angry, frustrated, someone comes with a hi, hello, howdoudo? A wry forced smile. Can you spot it. Oh yes, you can easily spot a plastic smile.

Plastic smile is no good. For the giver nor the taker. A smile from the heart, enriches, encourages, and strengthens. A plastic smile, dries you up and who would want a fake smile!

How do we smile from the heart? At any, and every situation? Knowing that Jesus has the whole universe spinning under his control, and that I am his apple of His eye, and that he has drawn me in his palm of his hands, gives me the trust and strength to face, come what may. As I learn to throw my burdens as quickly as I get, onto him, I can. Don't I now, have a reason to smile? To smile from the heart?

Love at last sight!

Yes, you read it right. Love at LAST sight. Not the head over heels, butterfly effect and pretty rainbows. Way past that, till death do us part. Through thick and thin. Through awkwardness, differences, silence, frustration, discouragement, arguments, disappointments. A love with all your heart, mind and soul.

In their book, Love at Last sight, Kerry and Chris Shook share the Word of God about relationship, in a down to earth practical way. Walking through the relationship puzzle with all its complexities, twists, turns, failure and challenge. Relationship is hard work. Intentional than convenient. Commitment rather than feelings. Action Adventure. Risking awkwardness, to move to the danger zone from a complacent comfort zone, giving up control and giving over to God. Pleasing God and not men. Accepting and not expecting. Learning to ask, listen and not assume. Accepting change as growth. Serving with humility and not selfishness. Treating people as priceless and not as perfect. Appreciating and not discouraging. Taking conscious effort to work togethar.

We hardly ever think seriously about it. Things that we take granted for, gets the special limelight on this book, as we learn to pause(STOP), challenge ourself into growing the kind of person God wants us to be. Nothing else matters. The insights on 'relationship lessons' from Jesus when he walked on earth, is amazing. I never realised there were so many.

"The next time you're face to face with someone you love, ask yourself, If this were the last time we were togethar on earth, what would I say, what would I do? " check out www.lastsightchallenge.com, you can read the first sample chapter under Books.

Show off

My mom/ bro called it the Red Sea Event. When you face a huge Sea in front, towering mountains on the sides, and an enemy army behind, you are frozen in your thoughts, and your foot is unsure of where to step into. Confused, perplexed and fear struck.

Frozen. Big time. I was into one such stuck inbetween period, when a friend of mine at lunch, just smiled and said, 'Well, that's the show off time'. I said,'a what?' He beamed, and said, well 'It can't be better than this'. Better??? I am all stuck on all 4 sides, and its better? He went on. 'This is the time for God to show off. You can't do anything, but he's gonna display his power and majesty so beautiful as you hold on to Him.'

Show off, He did. Many a times. When I've hit the dead end, he shows off with a way, as long as I trust him and walk in faith. Next time as I hit the Red Sea Event, I am all eager like my friend, ready to see His awesomeness. Knowing, he will show off his Mighty power and display his love as he has already done. Yes, there is confusion,and fear and anxiety so overwhelming in every decision, step I am to take, but I know that my God has been faithfull so far, and he is forever. I can walk with faith trusting him to take me through.

All I need.

Even when men abandon me, when my flesh stinks as its rotten
When all my wealth is lost , and I am pushed over saying I am no good.
Jesus is all I need.

They sang this beautiful song in tamil ( Yesu podhumae)in a prayer meeting last evening. Last time, I sang it, was in a hospital room. We had just got mom admitted coz she had difficulty breathing. Me, dad, Praveen were there, and just before they( dad n bro) left for the night, we had the family prayer. Mom loved this song, it became her favorite after she heard it being sung by a blind leper on a cold winter morning on the streets on her way to work. The peace in the face of this hungry begger, had left a mark on her heart.

That night mom was coughing blood, and I for one, had no idea that her lung nodules, were what was coming out nor that she had just 4 more days to live. May be my brother did. He choked at the verse above. Mom gave him a hug, she had her oxygen mask on,seated (she couldn't lie down her last 4 days.)

I don't think I can ever sing this song again. But I know for sure, that Jesus is all I need. I saw it in my mom's face.

Fine print!

Last week, I was given a task of researching on LED signs installation for our Church. So I was on the lookout for signboards. I cross one on the way to work everyday. But what I never noticed was the fine letters at the bottom of the sign board that gave the name of the installer and their phone number. So past few days, I have been straining to read the fine print on it and other LED signs that I pass through.

What made the difference? The same signs, the same places. I read the signs all the time, but had never noticed the fine print!

I believe we all have fine prints. Things that say something extra, even though we don't verbalise it. We can read between the lines, when a person is upset, but still doesn't look upset. Anger, indifference, disappointment, expectation, hope, longing for love. We can see that fine print in people that we meet with, the ones at the store, our collegues, neighbours, friends and family. But do we ever notice it? Do we take time, to even notice it? Its there alright, but do we read it? and then what do we do about it?

God does! and he wants us to be like him! Now I see sign boards everywhere with a fine print on them! and I hope I do what God wants me to do about it.

1 Samuel 16:7b"... Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."
Ephesians 5:1a Be imitators of Christ!

Just around the corner

More than I spend watching my face on the mirror, I spend lot of time online. Today, as I checked my messages on FB, I was horrified to read about a memorial service for a friend I had just chatted with last week. What on earth, was that! He was probably 23.

I know he is in heaven, happy with the Lord but what strikes me hard and strong, is how sudden, and how unexpected. How many do I chat with per day? What if... ( I HATE to complete that) How fragile and futile our life is! You step out on the streets, and you just never know! Forget the streets, in your own kitchen, I was thinking about all of it, and got my finger burnt. Freak/Fatal accidents can happen anytime! It's purely by God's grace that I am breathing.

What is important in life? Thoughts of what to eat for dinner today, what to wear to work for tmw, my appraisal next year, my savings this year, my career goals, what kind of house, car, health, family? Well, NONE of it is going to come with us when we die. How much prepared I am for the eternal life, and how many of my friends? In the light of an unexpected death, of me(you), or my(your) closest family or my (your) closest friends, or friends, could we bravely say, that I(u)/he/she is in heaven? What am I working towards..?

Priority!

Your best friend at school, with whom you spent hours togethar doing homework, playing, and cycling; is not around when you get to college. Your close friends from college with whom you always hangout with, are no where around, when you get a job. The collegues you were so close with, the lunch and coffee breaks, the weekends, the night outs, are not in touch as frequently as you used to be, since you moved out to a new project, new city, new company.

Your priority changes.

As a kid, all you learnt, all you looked up to was your mom, dad. Things change a little as you made friends. School friends, college friends, office friends. Things changed a whole lot, when you get married. Everything is your spouse. When a baby comes your way, the whole world takes a different turn. Now when two babies come, now that's an altogethar different story.

Change seems to be the constant factor. New people, come into our life, make a mark and leave. We don't have one person, who will always be there and be the same! There is a mismatch of time, frequency, understanding, behaviour, culture. Restricted by distance, space and way of life. How many times, have you stopped short in a conversation, because it doesn't feel the same anymore. ( I am often stuck with the mundane 'Hi, How are you? Howz work? ' with the best friends of yester years! ) Priority seems to change every time.

But thank God, we have One who can understand, love, and is the same yesterday, today and forever. One, with whom I can talk anytime, and feel close. What is my priority to Him?

Heb 13:8 Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever!
Matthew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness.

Breezee

Well, I have resisted change all my life. So when my new roomate moved in, I wasn't so sure. And we were so very different. Food, language, lifestyle, hobbies, likes, dislikes, interests, expectations, everything was different.

But looking back at the 3 months she was here, I have had nothing but fun. We did all crazy things togethar. Shopping, eating out, walking, stories we shared, movies we saw, or just the talks on and on, and boy, she is a great cook! Our favorite show on TV is the AFV. We could see that for hours again and again. ROFL literally.

Its been like a cool breeze, that was soothing, gentle and quick enough. I thank God for giving a good friend. I am not sure, how she'll respond when she knows about this blog, she's up in the flight flying home. Its been just 3 hours, and I already miss her!

'Change is good! - from Freshman Father

Lifted up!

'Lord, I lift your name on high.... '
'We wanna see Jesus lifted high... '
Cast your burdens... Higher higher... lift Jesus higher..'

Lifting hands, and standing on toes for these action songs at Sunday school, may be got me the idea, that lifting was lifting up high above. So 'lift your name on high..' is that lifting up in sky? or 'We wanna see Jesus lifted up!' was it up the cross?? What did really mean?

Last Sunday when we were singing some lifting up songs, i kinda stopped abruptly. Here was a God, who created the heavens ( including all galaxies, stars, nebeulas, the powerful sun, the cooling moon) the earth, powerful volcanoes, the lightning, the thunder, the awesome waterfalls, the animals, from tall giraffes, teeny ant, huge whales and tiny tadpoles, the lil sparrows and the huge eagles, the pretty rose bush, to the giant oak trees, the lil womb, to huge heavy weight champions, the complex innovative brain, the complex nervous system, whew how great, how great is thou art!

An awesome, amazing God, and he says, he lives in you and me! Inside me! How crazy is that.

Now that being the case, as I get up snoozing my alarm dozen times, fix my hair, breakfast, and rush to work, and check my mails more than a dozen time( or more)in 5 mins, eat n do my own mundane stuff, where is the power of Him inside me? Half the time I am oblivious of the fact, that he is within me. Oh yes, I go to him for any hue and cry at work, family, or my health ( say as silly as seeing a bunch of white hairs!) How funny?!

You won't believe, how many people know that my dad is coming here. They say it is written all over my face, as I am beeming and oh yes downright excited!

But how much of excitement, should I really have in having the all powerful God WITHIN me? Talk about limiting him! I hardly do a thing to lift him up above my daily chores. Ofcourse I pray, read my bible, but that's still limiting him. Imagine, I have him, who has the power to heal, to forgive, to care and love unconditionaly. And ofcourse I have my stupid self, that ALWAYS thinks abt me, me and me alone all the time. As I say, I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection. How much do I really know?? or the fellowship of the sufferings, becoming like him in his death! Hardly. The sacrifice he did, denying his power, or the humility he wore and the life he lived.

Well, back to lifting up, I think its high time I put him above all things in my daily life. Boy, he says its a holy temple! Wuf! I need to give him the due. Lifting him up above me. Above my self, my decisions, my finances, my desires, my thoughts, my expectations, my past, my present and my future. He is the all, my all in all, let me stop singing, and start living.

phil 3:8

Staying up late?

Ever stayed up late? Not at the movies, partying with friends, or working, or chatting. Worried about the wrinkles on your face, dark circles under your eyes, flabs on your hips, and tummies?

Well, am talking about staying up late because your child is sick or/and in the emergency room, worried because your baby in your womb may be missing a beat, and that you eat for your baby, you are worried about every single cell in your womb growing into an organ, into a baby!

Yes, am talking about mothers, who seem to have unconditional love swelling in them ALWAYS for their kids. Be it a baby in the womb, a terrible two, a teen or a grown up! As my friend said, you can't get rid of your kids, they just keep growing. You first wait for them to turn over, then crawl, then few baby steps, walk, potty train, talk, run, dress up, ride a tricyle, a bicycle, read, sing, study, make friends, btw, fix breakfast, lunch and dinner, snacks, morph into a doctor, teacher, coach, friend, well the list seems endless. I can't believe how my mom raised us FOUR kids!

Gracious, compassionate, slow to anger, rich in love. Ps 145:8. God wanted us to see the impossible, yet practical, logical, sample of him face to face. He gave us all, 1 per person, to absorb, relish the love, forgiveness, patience, care that He has and gives; through MOTHERS. Hats off to them!

As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you. Isaiah 66:13
..As a hen gathers her chicks under her wings.. Luke 13:34
Staying up late? Next time, think about them :)

Mirror mirror on the wall,

IF you had known me personally, you would know by now, my 2 great weaknesses.
1. Memory.- I can't remember what I had for breakfast, few minutes back.
2. getting up early- Being a nite owl, it has always been a struggle.

This was such a Monday morning, when I had snoozed the alarm for an hour, got up late, and hastily getting ready. I was combing by long hair HURRIEDLY, that I stopped short seeing the image in the mirror in front of me. I peered into my image in the mirror. I felt like seeing my mom. I don't have her lips, was it the cheek? eyes perhaps? brows? may be forehead? I am not sure.

I also catch myself doing things that my mom used to. The way she used the knife for mixing food, the dosa, the salt, sambar. I knew what she would say, on any situation. She wasn't around, she wasn't seeing, but I knew, and I do, even though she aint looking! Strange.

Remember looking at any baby and saying, she resembles her dad/mom? Well,I guess, that's what God expects too. To be in his image. To do what he would want us to.

Magnolia!

Near our balcony ( Am on the 3rd floor), we have this huge tree, that is blooming with flowers. The flowers are pure white, and are as big as the size of my palm.

There are hundreds of buds on that tree and nearly every morning, I come to the balcony with the hope of seeing a white tree, full of the pretty white flowers. It's been few weeks, but no. I get to see one or may be 2 white flowers, the rest are happy to remain as buds. Why don't they bloom quickly! I am running out of patience!

Oh yes, they die as quickly as they bloom too, the petal dry sticking to the flower, and get brown like brownies :( It looks sad, but I know, they can't live forever, just as how we can't. And just as each flower blooms at its own time, we all have our own time to bloom in our life! But whenever they do, they are the prettiest bunch ever! Oh am so blessed to see this Magnolia everyday, to remind me!

Seeds along the path

I cross a huge church everyday to work. It has interesting marquee signboards that they keep changing. The latest one read 'Healing the family'. Hundreds of cars go past. It is a busy street. How many people see it. Does that mean anything at all?

Only the sick need the healing. Only those who seek find it. Only those who thirst, need water. For others, it makes no sense as we are Stable, Settled, Satisfied? Insensitive. Sublime? Indifferent? I don't know. Plastic?

Only an empty glass, gets refilled. Only a softened heart, a good soil is ready for seeds to produce crop 30,60,100 folds. Makes me realise, that I need to empty every day, make my heart tender, humble towards God and men. Realise the need of the El Salvador.

Spring!

Rightly named. Looking around, I see everything fresh, the grass, the leaves on the trees. The bare cold winter melting away and life springing forth out of every thing that was brown.

I pass through lot of trees on the way to office, and all I see now is fresh green, bottle green, so bright and clean.. Such beautiful leaves springing up from all trees, that were once so very barren, brown and dead.

The flowers are so wonderful. Red, blue, yellow, orange, the colors seem to be splashed all over the place, as if from an artist's paint brush. Where were these flowers for so long? An overnight miracle? The dead grass, springing forth with fresh bright green grass, now spotted with hundreds of wild flowers all over the place.

Change is beautiful. Yes, I do agree now. Things might look barren, but I know deep inside I have a living Spring. And as long as I draw from it and let it touch all my being, I know I will spring forth with green grass and bright flowers!

I never knew

Well, I've never seen popcorns being made so far. I have seen the Popcorn guy handing it out. I have seen it magically change in the microwave. But today, I got to see it firsthand.

I never knew the kernels were so small. I never knew the heat could bring out so much good out out of them. I never knew they taste awful, without salt!

I have been muling over for sometime.I never know, why I ended up here. I probably would not. But just because I never knew, it dint exist! ..Lesson learnt 1.I may not know the big picture. I may not understand why. But there are things you may not understand at all 'RIGHT NOW' 2. The heat may be painful enough.. But its good.. Popcorns are good. aren't they? And I know my maker wont let it burn..

PS: I made some chappati today for the church potluck. Not just that, I taught how to make them in my pastor's home. The funny side is, I never knew how to make them 2 months back. I learnt it for dad.. I never knew, the big picture!

zib?wqz6

Well, that was the pwd given to me at work in Nov 2007. I was told, I can't change it the first two days. I had to use this pwd for accessing ALL my stuff. I had to write it down, memorise it so that I dint lock my account.

Well, at the end of two days, I had used it for nearly for 50-60 times, that it was imprinted on my memory. Believe it or not, I dint change it for the next 4 months! :D

Now after 2 years, I still remember it.. Knowing my capacity for memory, you know that it is an achievement. Its funny, that certain things stick with us.

Certain things/people look complex and difficult at first.. but then, you get around it.....

Love language

I am with a bunch of friends, who speak different languages. Gujarati, Hindi, Telugu, Haryana. I try to make out what they are trying to say, and end up having no clue. Today, I laughed when everyone laughed, and even ventured to interpret what they said. Everyone had a good ribtickling laughter, as they heard my interpretation. I was badly, madly, entirely wrong!

Talking of different language, Mike said about 'Love Language'. This is unique for every one in the planet. How you show your love,to the one you love. One may show love by buying a gift, or doing some chores, or hugging, or spending time, a caring, understanding or encouraging word, or cooking.

And here comes the tough part. To show love, you need to speak the love language of the other person you love. Else it will be like Greek to the other person, and Hindi to the other.

What language do u speak to your mom, dad, brothers, sisters, loved ones, friends? Yours or theirs??

Chaos

Apart from the shock of seeing a well planned cold blooded murder, by a known very ' righteous' man , it was amazing to see it recorded blatantly in the Bible. Uriah and David. Though being a king, who has right to kill anyone, anytime, the incident was not hidden, not justified. Not excused.

Well, reading it I felt bad for Uriah. Here was a dedicated guy, who says he wont go home, when the army and the tabernacle is out in the battle. One who obeys immediately and even carries his own death sentence!! Wuf... David repented, that's true, but Uriah dint know that. What if David meets Uriah(In heaven). How would he explain himself?

It will be utter chaos in heaven, if one is not reconciled, even if he repents. Reconciliation to the one, to whom we had done wrong. Apologising, accepting and setting our relationships right is as important as repenting to God. David dint get a chance. Do you?

2 Samuel 11

Worst case scenarios

I've made a habit of cooking it up. Say I call someone, and nobody picks up, it could either be
1. the person is not interested in talking, the person ignores my call. No return calls, or remorse for a missed call. Too busy with more important things.
2. The battery was down. or The phone was in the other room. The phone was in silent mode. There is some problem with the phone. Was in a middle of an important meeting or call.There was no signal. or worst case, the phone was stolen.

We always think. But if we train ourself to justify the other person action as in point 2, it is a sea of difference. We can apply this daily to any situations when someone is late, someone hasn't replied your emails, messages, calls, or be it someone did not return your smile, or 'good morning'. Saves a lot of disappointments.

I've practiced it for few years now, and am still learning. Couple of us go to work in car pool. My friend, whom I have known for nearly 2 yrs, is ALWAYS punctual. When I say punctual, he is dot on time. Not a minute late. For him, 1 minute late is VERY late. Being the opposite, I have learnt to be early most of the time when going with him. In all these days, only once he was late. Just once. For 30 mins. It was cold windy day. Standing in the parking lot, I lost all my nerve. I was mad. Had I put into practice my WCS theory, I could have kept my cool. Well, his boss had called and he couldn't inform he was late. But the anger that boiled inside me was so enormous and though it had a lid on it.. I don't think it was worth it. WCS theory... I guess I still have a long way to go.

Finaly it drills down to this secret. To expect from God and not on men.

I hate cooking!

Just like my mom. Yes, you heard it right. The first time she ever cooked, was after marriage, when she made upuma without salt. Dad always exclaims, wonderful, marvelous to whatever you cook, and that turned her into a marvelous cook, I had ever known.

Mom cooks quick and tasty. Her idlis,sambar, chicken, putu, biriyani, paayasam.. whew they were mouth watering. I started cooking, for the love of mom. I loved to surprise her. She sure was surprised, by my burnt rice, burnt chicken, burnt milk ( oh yeah) and burnt everything. Ask my brothers, they even have a name for all my messed up food.

As I look back, its been 12 yrs of my stint with kitchen! I cook the essentials. I had resolved only to cook for mom.. But these days I cook for dad. Nothing beats the happiness you get, when you get nothing to eat( no leftovers), since it tasted so good! :) My friend says you can leave everything, anything, do anything, for the love of your life! How lovely!

Huh, now it makes me wonder, what I do for 'THE love' of my life? The least I can do is spend some quiet time every morning.. For all the things he has done for me... and to know that all he asked for was one tenth.. yickes.. that means 2.4hrs/day :(

Sea of faces!

The place where I work houses nearly 9000 employees. Unfortunately, everytime I have to reach my building, I have to cross the Food Court. Lunch time can be so overwhelming. The place is so loud and overflowing, that you wish no one was there.

It is quite irritating. But these days, I just let myself loose into the crowd. The sea of faces I see all around me. Lean face, Stout face, square, oval. Bushy eyebrows, thin, scanty ones. Eyes that seek, speak, eyes that are lifeless. Long straight nose,blunt small ones. Scowling face, smiling and frowning ones or plain blank ones. Tall ones, short ones. differently abled folks. Short hair, curly and straight ones.

Such a variety of faces, and definitely distinct behavior and voices! Strange, how not one of them resemble another. All are so very different! Yet we are, so oblivious of that fact, and move around like machines, trying to avoid eachother with a straight face! Nowadays, I dont get irritated, it leaves me in awe, at how amazing we have all been created!

I am fearfully and wonderfully made!

Getting along!

Have you wondered why we get along SO well with few people? Though they are a world different in their character and ideas from us, there are few with whom, we feel easily comfortable. I've got friends, who compliment my character. Their simple hi would pep me up, when I am down. Or when I am so hyper, up in the sky, they bring me down instantly, and ensure I don’t break my bones.

We need not explain much to them. They just understand. They know what to say when. They could be your roommates, teammates, your manager, your siblings, your parent , spouse or other family member or a schoolmate, collegemate, a colleague or just a friend in chat!

But many a times, we don’t get such person around. Mostly. People turn us off. Irritate,discourage you, push and hurt you so badly. Always misunderstand, and disagree! We either avoid such person, or bite our teeth and play along for the sake of it. But the challenge I guess, is in understanding that complex character, and getting along with that person.

Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
1 John 3:11 This is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another

99 years!

Last week, my bro and I standing on mom's tombstone, listened to the caretaker saying that road that led there, was on lease only for 99 years. Up propped the question on our heads, 'what after that?' He seemed to have read our thoughts. He said, 'You aren't going to be here, neither am I. None of us here! '

Isn't strange, that all that we have, all that we are, all that we work for,isn't going to be here '99 years'. My lyricist bro, started singing out a song. My bank balances, my house, my car, my education, all my dresses, my shoes, my family, my friends... huh ho.. Nothing is gonna be here for 99 years! I wont be here, neither will you.

I Corin 7:29-31
What I mean, brothers, is that the time is short.... From now on those who mourn, should live as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep; those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away

Why not?

'Why' me? 'Why' now? 'Why' cant they understand? ' Why' should I? 'Why' cant I? WHY is something that blows our mind quite often.

I heard somewhere, that whenever you feel the urge to ask Why, ask yourself Why-not?

Why-not is way too difficult. To ask ' Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated? ICorin 6:7 as in the Bible, is to fight your own self head on.

Be it money as small as 5 Bucks or 5 lakhs, or be it in any relationship - a friend, a spouse, a parent, the feeling of being wronged, cheated, used up, taken for granted, just lets the steam rise, anger overflows, hatred boils up, mouth goes foul and bitterness spreads.

The only answer to this, is to be wrapped up in Christ's love. The way he let himself get beaten up, wronged and hung on the cross. I'll go take a dip.

Dew aint enough..

Mom loved the bright colorful flowers, and our garden always used to burst with red, yellow, blue, orange flowers. She loved each plant, that she used to even talk to them. Bunch of yellow flowers in our garden caught my attention last Sunday. It brought a smile to my face, and a big frown as I then noticed a wilting plant next to it. I turned around to see, the entire garden lifeless, and wilting. ( Guess the yellow was just to get my attention)

Wasn't the past entire month cold in Chennai? There was dew on the plants every morning, and I had thought it would be sufficient, which apparantly wasn't.

I realise, what I read hurriedly from the Bible, a quick prayer everymorning aint enough either, just like the dew which dint reach the roots.

I am gonna ensure the garden gets watered everyday.